


Fantasy

by renecdote



Category: Batman - All Media Types, Teen Titans - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Gen, ambiguous ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-01
Updated: 2017-09-01
Packaged: 2018-12-22 09:42:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,142
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11964771
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/renecdote/pseuds/renecdote
Summary: What do you think about when you think you're about to die?





	Fantasy

**Author's Note:**

> For a prompt by an anon on tumblr: Could you do something with Tim and this bit of dialogue? "I'm not to blame, you guys dared me to do it." "Actually we specifically told you it was a bad idea, multiple times, and tried to stop you more than once." "Like I said, you dared me."
> 
> Apparently my superpower is taking prompts that lend themselves toward humour/fluff and writing angst instead… No warnings, but implied major injuries and ambiguous ending.

At the edge of his mind is the tantalising, half-formed thought that they'll laugh about this later. He'll probably be swaddled in bandages, propped up in bed or on the couch and Kon will be giving him those ridiculous puppy eyes that make him feel guilty for things that aren't even his fault. And Tim will shrug one shoulder even though it hurts and give an easy grin that pulls at the spectacular mulberry-coloured bruises across his face, and he'll say, "Hey stop making me feel bad about my heroic sacrifice. I'm not to blame, you guys dared me to do it."

Kon and Cassie will exchange exasperated looks while Kory glares at him from behind them (where she is no doubt on the phone to Nightwing, assuring him that Robin is banged up but fine and there's no need for him to drop everything and fly to San Francisco). Cassie will be the one to argue, without any real heat, "Actually, we specifically told you it was a bad idea, multiple times, and tried to stop you more than once."

"Like I said, you dared me," he'll retort, because everyone knows Robins have a problem with being told they can't do things. And the grin will become a little more real, a little less painful, because the way Cassie will smack his shin is downright fond and even Kon's eyeroll is just for show. Bart will appear, vibrating with excitement and worry, offended that nobody woke him up from his post-mission to crash to let him know Tim was awake and (mostly) okay.

It's a nice fantasy. But that's all it will ever be.

There's a reason the thought is only half-formed, blurry around the edges and missing several teammates who are equally as likely to dote and chastise. And It's not just that his thoughts are too floaty from blood loss to concentrate on any one for too long. It's not even that the burning pain down his side and across his back keeps distracting him, or that the voice - or several - buzzing in his ear keeps claiming his attention every time he tries to drift back into the daydream. It might, possibly, probably, most likely, have something to do with giving up hope though. What's the point in dreaming about things that are never going to happen? That's just setting yourself up for disappointment.

If Dick were here, he'd kick his ass for losing hope. But he's not here. And Tim's pretty sure the shrapnel from the explosion did more than just tear his suit to shreds so there probably isn't much ass (or anything else) left to kick.

If he gets out of this though (emphasis on the _if_ ) he's going to be in so much trouble with his big brother. Probably bubble wrapped. Definitely not let out of his sight for... maybe ever. Bruce and Alfred are bound to be just as ~~overbearing~~ caring. Robins getting caught in exploding buildings hits a little too close to home for all of them. Tim feels bad about putting them through that again. Not intentionally but it was still kinda his own fault.

"Don't do anything stupid," Vic had told him earlier, somewhere near the middle of the fight when they'd been losing horribly, overwhelmed by the hundreds of tiny robotic creatures that just seemed to keep multiplying. Robin had paused at the edge of the block they'd contained the fight to, eyeing the building the bots were streaming out of. If they could just take down the villain-of-the-week in control, he knew they could end the fight and get on with cleanup. Kon and Cassie had both told him to take back-up, that going in alone was one of his dumber ideas, but Tim had waved them off, told them he'd be fine, that everyone else was needed on the ground to contain the fight. He hadn't counted on the failsaif that triggered an explosion when the villain's central command room was breached.

(Stupid. Should have realised. Should have been more careful. Should have been better.)

But he maintains that it hadn't been a completely stupid move. It had been smart, going after the player rather than the pieces on the board. A calculated risk. With a somewhat miscalculated outcome.

Batman likes to believe he can save everyone, but Tim has a slightly more flexibly moral code. The greater good for the greater number. And if he keeps coming out on the 'regrettable but acceptable casualties' end of the scale? Well. That's okay as long as everyone else lives. ~~Those of them who aren't dead already.~~

He wonders, through the blood seeping past his hairline, whether Bruce will blame himself. Another child soldier dead. Doesn't matter that he was on the opposite side of the country, that this was a Titans mission not a Batman one, that Bruce had given him all the skills he needed to avoid or get out of situations like this (whether he's currently able to use them or not). He hadn't even wanted him to be part of the new Teen Titans at first. Bruce is about the furthest thing from a guilty party here. Doesn't mean he won't feel guilty though. And he'll never know that Tim doesn't want him to. He spent so much time teaching them to accept the repercussions of their mistakes, the least he could do is let Tim own this one.

Another shaky breath stutters in his chest and a moment of blind panic washes over him because he doesn't really want to die. He wants Kon to burst through the remains of the eggshell-coloured walls and fly him back to the tower. He wants Kory to lecture him for making them all worry then smile her kind, 'all is forgiven' smile. He wants Bart to challenge him to multiple rounds of video games to keep him still and resting. He wants Cassie to drag the speedster off to spar when he gets too overbearing, only to sic Kon on him when he takes the opportunity to try getting some work done. He wants Gar to show him that movie he was talking about last week and make stupid jokes while they watch it. He wants Raven to quietly join them and continue trying to win their ongoing, mostly silent tea versus coffee debate even though she never will. He wants Dick to show up despite Kory's reassurances and fuss over him. He wants to get out of this fuckup and live.

Out of the corner of his eye, he sees a flutter of green and a streak of red and black. A flash of gold and a whirl of orange. A glint of silver and a wisp of purple.

His eyelids had become too heavy to keep open seconds- minutes- hours ago.

But it's a nice fantasy.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading. Kudos and comments are appreciated, or come visit me on [tumblr](http://tantalum-cobalt.tumblr.com/).


End file.
